St. Patty's Day flashback

Where do you go on vacation when you already live in paradise?

While you contemplate that philosophically-deep question, let me explain why I haven't posted anything over the last 10 days:

1. St. Patrick's Day -- It's always a killer. For all of my Annapolis people out there, you know what I'm talking about (P.S. I stayed away from back alleys and not a single police officer tackled me).

2. Friends In Town -- Indeed, my partner in debauchery, Nick, and his girlfriend, Kerrie, came for a five-day visit. I think they drank the punch and asked for seconds.

3. The Flu -- It floored me for about 36 hours but I'm now back and running (literally).

Let me start with St. Patty's Day. The good people at The VI Daily News thought I should take the day off on March 17. Enabler, you ask? Sure.

The day started at the Kokopelli's Cafe, where as soon as I walked in, they informed me that it was 2-for-1 beer day. Enabler, you ask? Hell yeah.

After I met and exceeded my day-time beer limit, I ventured back home to rendezvous with my lady, who had just got off work. It was St. Patty's so I had a perfect excuse for being twisted at 4 p.m.

"They let the office out early so we all could go to Happy Hour," she tells me. "And no one has to go in tomorrow until 11 a.m. Isn't that great?"

"Enabler?" I mumbled.

"What are you talking about?" she asked. "You're drunk. I'm driving."

When we go to the bar in Red Hook, we find out that her company rented out a bar in the back room and the Grey Goose vodka was free. But that didn't stop Brianna's boss from ordering me countless shots of tequila. Sure, that works, I thought. It's St. Patty's Day, the top-shelf vodka is free and her Vin Diesel-look-alike boss is fast-talking me and sneaking the dirty Mexican into the party through the back door.

I asked the boss if he had ever seen the movie Boiler Room and he said he'd never seen it. That happened right before we started to stumble over to the only tame night club on the island -- I heard it had a stripper pole.

The rest of the night is off the record. Good day to you, sir.